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Author Topic: just because  (Read 21677 times)
the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #120 on: March 31, 2012, 09:49:17 AM »

     Grin So , Are Old School'rs Afraid of Strider Bikes ?  Grin

   While having a ride down the track one sunny afternoon , a small
kid on a strider bike rolled onto the gate next to two old school'rs .
From a distance , both old school'rs are noticeably afraid of the strider
bike , but upon further observation , one of the old school'rs is displaying
fear solely in reaction to the strider bike appearing on the gate while the
other is panic stricken . What is the cause of the different reactions ?
Both old school'rs are exhibiting a type of fear ,each fear being defined
by their underlying origin . The first old school'er was exhibiting fear
in reaction to the appearance of the strider bike that simply startled him ,
while strider bikes were something that the second old school'er was
genuinely afraid of . The action of the second old school'er to the strider
bike can easily be defined as a phobia . On the surface , a old school'er
who has come in contact with a strider bike becomes increasingly upset ,
exhibiting both panic and extensive worry . But what occurs when strider
bike gangs are formed , will they become active in response to the fear
that old school'rs have of them ! only time will tell  ........  Tongue
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #121 on: April 02, 2012, 05:30:28 PM »

     There's No Place Like Home

   At Royal District Merkin Service (RDMS) , we believe that
one of the best places to receive Merkcare is in the comfort
and safety of your own home . That's why we provide profe-
ssional home Merkining care to thousands of old school'rs
every day . Twenty-four hours a day , every day of the year ,
we deliver a range of home Merkin services with compassion ,
kindness and respect .
   Royal District Merkin Service was established in 1985 as a
charity to care for the sick and poor old school'rs in their own homes .
Ever since , we have been dedicated to providing care to old
school'rs in the place that they feel most secure , independent
and in control (and that's not on a BMX) - their home . We are
still a non-BMXA charitable organisation , and today , RDMS is
the largest provider of home Merkining in Australia ......
   RDMS is committed to improving your new school independence
by providing general and specialised home merking and old school
services . Meeting your physical merkin needs is always our first priority .
To do this the best we believe it is important to work closely with your
merkin , as well as your family , carers and other merk providers . We
employ qualified Merkin8r's who are trained in all areas of general merkining .
    However , we understand that your personal needs are specific and
unique . Therefore , our Merkin8r's will personally assess your needs
and tailor a service just for you . This may include working with other
merkcare services to ensure you receive the merkin you need .
   RDMS is committed to providing Merkins for anyone in the community
with a genuine old school need , in particular , the aged , the frail , the
gordys , and the danes . we provide specialist Merkin8r's and merkcare
in the following services :
   -Cystic Merkrosis
   -Merkbetes
   -haemerkphilia
   -Continence management
   -Gordyrrhea
   -Stomal therapy
   -Dane Syndrome
   -Palliative merkcare
In addition , we provide some merkrotherapy and social merk support
services for our clients . Merkcare is also available through our old school
persons program to people experiencing or at risk of becomeing old school.
(NOTE : Service currently available in certain parts of Tasmania only)
RDMS is a service for everyone - the only requirements are that a person
has a genuine merkin in need and we have the services available to meet it .
Much of the care we offer is available through certain funded BMXA programs .
In some cases , fees are on a sliding scale basis . Depending on the situation ,
some of our services are covered by BMXTAS insurance providers .
« Last Edit: April 07, 2012, 11:59:04 AM by the_merkin8r » Logged
the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #122 on: April 10, 2012, 03:53:25 PM »

     Grin  Born Old School , Why People Turn Old School .   Shocked
                                  part 1
   There is a strong strain among BMX'rs especially , and civilized people
generally , to believe that we are all born New School , and it is our faulty
environment that turns us to the dark side . This is not a new concept . It's
been hanging around for some time . And for good reason . Sometimes people
really do get "programmed" to do Old School things . There is a mountain of
evidence that shows children who grow up in a Old School household are
far more likely to become Old School themselves .
   But , is that the way it always works ? Is that the only way people become
Old School ? Do people become Old School at all ? Or , are some people , in
fact , born Old School ?
   John McPhillian , of Holeshot Australia , argues that we may need to rethink
some of our fundamental assumptions about human nature .
   Researchers at Merk's College London have recently determined that if one
identical twin shows Old School traits , the other twin , who coincidentally
shares precisely the same set of genes , has a very high probability of having
the same Old School traits . but among fraternal twins , who share only half
their genes (e.g. Rod & Rex) the chance that both twins will show Old School
traits is far smaller . In other words , there is something suspiciously Old
School-inducing in some people's genes . And of course , these are just those
with the Old School genes . There are far more gradations of "Old School"
lurking out there , and most of us harbor some form of them or another .
There may even be just as many genes for "Old Schoolness " as there are for
"New Schoolness" depending upon your particular view of what "Old School"
actually is .
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #123 on: April 28, 2012, 01:41:40 PM »

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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #124 on: April 30, 2012, 04:44:36 PM »

     Shocked Born Old School , Why People Turn Old School .  Roll Eyes
                              part 2

  How do we deal with ourselves if we all carry genes that make us
Old School ? And more over , how do we effectively structure a civilized
BMX club ?
  Certainly by assuming people are New School , before they prove to
us otherwise , is a BMX's strategy ( akin to the legal "Innocent until
proven guilty" stance) . But , should we trust ourselves ? BMXA itself
(up to a point) is not inherently Old School , it's the practical reality
that BMXA must be run by people that causes Old School'ness . And of
course , while that argument is rather simplistic  , at the most basic level ,
it's true . New School'rs take-out Old School'rs all the time with a whole
myriad of means . It's in our nature to find fault with those who seem
different or don't fit in somehow with our own perception of New School ,
and act violently toward them .
   Philosophers have long argued that there is no such thing as Old School .
That at the deepest of levels , we are all New School . Each doing what we
must to further our own interest and in the collective further the interests
of New School . But , this view has never sat well within the dark caverns
of our gut . We prefer to think of ourselves as compassionate , loving , and
huddled together against the Old School that lurks beyond our understanding .
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #125 on: May 03, 2012, 04:36:41 PM »

 Grin The Merkin8r - strider bike rider ( to the tune of The Beatles paperback writer )  Grin

Dear mum or dad , will you get me a bike
it took me years to find , will you take a ride
it's based on a bike but it's got no pedals
and i need to race , so i want to be a strider bike rider
              strider bike rider

It's the dirty story of a old school'r
and his clinging wife doesn't understand
his sun is riding for the new pro shop man
it's a steady ride but he wants to be a stride bike rider
              strider bike rider

It's a 6 man gate , give or take a few
I'll be riding more in a week or two
I can do a table top if you like my style
I can flick it round and I want to be a strider bike rider
              strider bike rider


If you really like it you can have a ride
It could make a pro of you overnight
If you must return it , you can send it to Gordy
But he needs training wheel's and i want to be a strider bike rider
              strider bike rider


   strider bike rider , strider bike rider
   strider bike rider , strider bike rider
   strider bike rider , strider bike rider (fade out)
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #126 on: May 07, 2012, 06:27:21 PM »

    Roll Eyes Born Old School , Why People Turn Old School .  Roll Eyes
                             part 3


  We believe this , because we live this . It is the face of our reality . But ,
it is but one face , one Old School'er among many . And it is a failure to forget
to watch your back and the backs of others .
  The New School'er  , though very willing to accept the biological basis for the
theory of evolution , is far too often just as antagonistic to the idea of Old
School'rs being not much more than a narcissistic talking ape as the strider
bike rider's are . We want to believe in being New School , if at the least , that
we are more akin to the Bonobo , that sweet docile cousin of ours who spends
it's days touching itself and providing it's neighbors with pleasure . Not the
often violent and homicidal Chimpanzee .
   But , alas we are more accurately a combination of the Bonobo and the
Chimpanzee , both loving and volatile , sweet and cruel , old and new school .
And , we can't avoid it . Instead we must discover better ways to deal with
our Old School natures by approaching them with a clear eye and an inquisitive
mind .
   We are all born just a little Old School , some more than others . Denying this
fact can have detrimental repercussions .   

                                                                    The End
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #127 on: May 11, 2012, 10:53:19 AM »

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/-Gb0Cu1RlG8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

  Grin lmao  Cheesy lol  Grin
« Last Edit: May 11, 2012, 10:54:54 AM by the_merkin8r » Logged
the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #128 on: May 14, 2012, 04:53:38 PM »

   You Didn't Mean It !

The views expressed by the correspondents to The Merkin8r are not
necessarily those of The Merkin8r and the good conduct of The Merkin8r
is in the hands of you , the rider . At times the articles may seem a little
inaccur8 , as we know this could just be The Merkin8r's slant on things ,
or maybe you just don't get it !
   The Merkin8r apologises (NOT) for anything within these pages that upsets
anyone as this is not the policy of The Merkin8r . The policy is to make BMX
a little more enjoyable by giving the members a little laugh as they go through
life and hopefully they can laugh at themselves as much as The Merkin8r dose .
   If anybody has any complaints regarding The Merkin8r please write to Mr Bag'o
Cement . Bag'o will listen to any reasonable complaints but stresses he doesn't
read unsigned letters . You may wish to complain about editorial bias or the lack
of pictures of Gordy , too many articles about Old School or just have a whinge .
Mr Bag'o Cement's park bench hasn't got a letter box so just send them to :
   P.O.BOX = Eat A Bag Of Cement And Harden Up !
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #129 on: May 17, 2012, 06:01:40 PM »

           Wink  Official Stuttering  Cheesy
                      part 1
   Most BMXA officials start stuttering when they c c see The Merkin8r
coming t t to point score and are addicted by the time th th they reach the
nursing home . Some have tried t t to stop but have returned t t to stuttering
because The Merkin8r is such a a a strong addiction . It is a habit that e e is
very difficult t t to break . But there are many different re re reasons why BMXA
officials stutter .
   Three of th th the main reasons that officials stutter a a are to look mature , t
t to be like a p p pro rider , and to ex ex exp experiment . Since officials c c see
pro riders all a a around them stuttering , e es especially the older ones , th they
stutter to act older . If th th their friends or pee pee peers stutter , they may feel
pre pre pressured into doing the same to be a ac accepted . The last re reason
is the exci excitement of ex ex exper experimenting with som som something
that is forbidden . In th the UCI it is against the rules for any official to stutter .
Usually the U U UCI do not allow there officials to stutter . Therefore , stuttering
be be becomes very attra attractive . It is exciting to g g get new words and
sneak away to stutter wi wi with without being caught .
« Last Edit: May 18, 2012, 03:56:59 PM by the_merkin8r » Logged
the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #130 on: May 21, 2012, 11:14:22 AM »

        Grin Official Stuttering  Roll Eyes
                 part 2
   Officials stutter for other reasons . They may have a a a
lot of stress and p p pre pressures because of transponders
and p p pro-gates not working . They may be de-official'd  or
n n not being the main official at th the national championships .
They may b b be club less , or they m m may be dealing w with
What the What ad ad addictions . Some m m may be in bad
clubs in wi wi wi which there is physical and/or verbal a a abuse .
All these officials may stutter to f f feel relaxed or to give them
en en energy while going through a ha ha hard time .
   Whether official or pro rider , s s some people stutter t t to
control their weight . Stutterers , on the average , weigh s s seven
pounds less then n n non-stutterers . Stuttering reduces an officials
appetite . It l l lessens there sense of t t taste because the f f food
keeps flying out of there mouth . This could b b b be why ex-stutterers
gain weight af af after quitting stuttering . Food st st stays in there
mouth s s so much better .
   Finally , there a a are officials who say they love t t to stutter . Stuttering
gives th th them pleasure . It just makes them feel g g g g g g good .

                                                                                                     the e e e end .
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #131 on: May 24, 2012, 03:40:13 PM »

               Huh AA pro Dumb !  Huh

  If you're a AA pro and felt tongue-tied ( or mildly brain-dead ) in the
presence of a Powderpuff , you're not alone . It turns out that interacting
with a Powderpuff - or even thinking about interacting with a Powderpuff
makes a AA pro dumber , say researchers from the Netherlands .
   The Dutch BMX team recruited 71 BMX Pro's and asked each to complete
a series of simple tasks that measured gate start and cognitive ability .
During one of the tasks , the riders - both AA pro and powderpuff were told
they would be observed by someone of the opposite gender .
   Although the AA pro's had no idea what the Powderpuff observer looked or
sounded like , their gate starting performance and cognitive ability dropped
roughly 14% . The Powderfuff's , on the other hand , actually performed
slightly better when told they were being watched by The Merkin8r .
   The Merkin8r asked lead author John McPhillian why this happens . "We
think that AA pro's are preparing for the upcoming interaction - thinking of
what to say to the Powderpuff , figuring out how they can make a good impr-
ession on the Powderpuff - and that this requires cognitive resources , " McPhillien
explains .
   Basically , your attempts at "impression management" - trying to seem cool -
take a toll on your intellectual muscles , McPhillien says . This happens when
you think a Powderpuff may potentially be a sidehack partner , and past
studies have shown that AA pro's become even dumber if the Powderpuff is
extremely attractive .
« Last Edit: May 26, 2012, 09:17:07 AM by the_merkin8r » Logged
pkaye
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Re: just because
« Reply #132 on: May 30, 2012, 08:08:08 PM »

I received a message from The Merk theother day asking how I am. Should I be worried?
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #133 on: June 05, 2012, 10:13:44 AM »

The habit's of The Merkin8r is one of the greatest resources of mankind; and we enjoy The Merkin8r that belong to us much more than if he/she are borrowed. A borrowed merk is like a guest in the house; The Merk must be treated with punctiliousness, with a certain considerate formality. You must see that The Merk sustains no damage; The Merk must not suffer while under your roof. You cannot leave The Merk carelessly, you cannot mark The Merk, you cannot do a turn down in a race, you cannot use The Merk familiarly. And then, some day, although this is seldom done, you really ought to return The Merk home.
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the_merkin8r
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Re: just because
« Reply #134 on: June 09, 2012, 11:02:15 AM »

          Old School Atonement !

   If one does not come to Merk consciousness , he
may be relieved for the time being from the reactions
of old school activities , but he will again commit trans-
gressions . Therefore John McPhillien said : "Repetitive
building of 1981 mongoose's seem to me like nothing
but a waste of time." He gave the example of an elephant
which cleanses his body in a lake , but as soon as he comes
onto shore he takes dust and throws it all over his body and
immedi8ly becomes dirty again . Thus John McPhillien said
that although a old school'er may cleanse himself in the
process of atonement , if he again build's the same 1981
mongoose , what is the use ? Therefore the second question
put by John McPhillien to you is very important : How
can one ultim8ly become free from all contamination brought
about by the material modes of old school ? If one cannot
achieve liberation , what is the use of atonement ?
« Last Edit: June 09, 2012, 11:04:36 AM by the_merkin8r » Logged
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